You read the story of a child born today by a frozen embryo 31 years ago, practically the same age of his parents, and to shake off the bewilderment, you say that these things happen in Ohio, not by us; The Supreme Court of Alabama says that frozen embryos do not expire, they are worth in all respects. Come on, they are American extravagances.
Then you happen to hear from the protagonist’s voice, or rather the victims, what happened to us in these days. Maybe it’s worse. True and painful story but in order not to add salt on the wound I will not make names and surnames. Stay to hear.
The unilateral decision of the ex
A separated father, in the fifties, practicing Catholic, with three children of whom very young, had some time ago a story with his almost peers. He came from a painful separation, and lived a difficult moment, he went to the psychoanalyst. At a certain point, an idea came to his new partner: what do you say if the age advances, we share the seed and we keep it, who knows, for the future? She had already frozen her eggs for about ten years. They go to an ad hoc clinic, freeze the seed, signs a lot of sheets and go.
Then they leave themselves, after all it was not a long or important story, at least for him. He meets another person with whom he establishes a nice relationship, they are happily together, the past now seems finally overcome, she is very close to her children. His ex disappears, indeed it is unavailable for more than a year, perhaps two. Until one day of April he calls him and tells him that he has a son from his frozen seed in his womb, crossed to his eggs previously cryoprewed. It is already almost in the seventh month, it is now done.
Father without his knowledge
In short, you are Father, unbeknownst to youagainst your will, despite having been left for some time now. In July she became a mother, on the threshold of fifty years. He silenced him the decision to want a son from him, he silenced him pregnancy for months, he makes himself felt practically done things. He feels used, and abused. The world shakes in front of the involuntary father’s eyes, he does not know what to say to his girlfriend, his three children, his family. It has certainly made the lightness, in a moment of weakness, to indulge this purpose of freezing the seed.
But the implication is that tomorrow they could have decided together to have a child, though Togetherprecisely. But if they leave … instead, we know that motherhood is protected but little or nothing matters; It is she who carries out the pregnancy, it is she who gives birth, so it is her thing.
A choice without paternal consensus
But is it possible that a woman can decide on its own, without even consulting the partner, now ex, and making him find with his shoulders to the wall with a son who did not think of getting into the world? The sale of seeds and eggs is already aberrant, the Uteri for rentor at best, seed donors; But at least there is a conscious choice: who gives the seed does not want to know who the parents will then be.
I can understand, even without sharing, that a woman decides to want to be a mother without having a husband and not even an occasional partner, and therefore accept or pay this anonymous donation and proceed with artificial insemination. But if a couple who freezes a seed is presented in a clinic, is it possible that only her can present yourself, and decides unilaterally to have a child from the person with whom he is no longer together? Is it possible that the father is not informed of the intention of his ex-partner and his assent is not requested, trusting only the signatures affixed at the time, quickly, in a pile of pages?
One thing is, I repeat, the anonymous donor who leaves his seed with a lost bottom. Another is knowing that that seed belongs to a precise person who paid her in the event of deciding tomorrow to have a son with her.
A battle that arrives in court
The affair ends up in the hands of lawyers, will heavily involve the clinic and further tear the parents. And what about the newborn? What about your brothers or brother -in -laws? In short, what about the family?
Here, this is the problem: the maternity, conception and decision To bring into the world a creature are now independent of the family, its context, its affections, from the sharing between a husband and a wife. It is a matter that concerns only individual rights, and specifically it is a fact that concerns the woman, only to then perhaps claim on the reluctant father, made extraneous to his own paternity.
Science without consciousness
This is now the “culture” that prevails. And I often feel of women who plan to have a son but without wanting a husband, a father for his children, considered almost by clutter. The child must be their continuation, a kind of extension of their self.
How many sunny women and how many lesbian couples design frozen eggs or do -it -yourself maternity, without the help of anyone, or with occasional partners used as the fur with the queen bee? Or, in other cases, the birth of a child without the paternal consensus is a blackmail weapon against the former partner, to force him to deal with the birth of the creature and perhaps to surrender to her, the Regina bee.
I don’t know how it will end, I am not a man of law to say it, but I have the impression that there is a legislative void in this field. And I hope it is filled with common sense, with a natural sense of justice and an effective and sensitive evaluation of the damage accomplished in this way to the newborn, to his father, his family and his old and new affections.
Then they say the miracles of science; But the science without consciousness Transform dreams into nightmares.
