In a football that now seems to have seen everything, including algorithms, VAR and futuristic stadiums, Sassuolo suddenly rediscovers the charm (so to speak) of the nineteenth century. It is not a new tactical scheme by Fabio Grosso, but a return to the origins of medicine: the whooping cough. Just on the eve of the match against Juventusthe black and green club finds itself managing an outbreak that seems to have come out of a primary school subsidiary rather than a Serie A medical report.
While the medical staff isolates the “suspects”, there is talk of six affected players, the echo of the cough bounces violently on social media. If for doctors we talk about prophylaxis, for the people of the web the diagnosis is another: the forceful return of the «Scansuolo». The conspiracy thesis, which promptly blossoms every time the Emilians meet the Bianconeri, runs quickly among memes and ferocious jokes: “It’s not whooping cough, it’s an allergy to the Lady”, someone writes, while photomontages of players on the pitch with syrup instead of a water bottle are flocking.
The invisible drama of dreamers
If people cough in Reggio Emilia, in the rest of Italy they cry. It is the silent and desperate drama of the fantasizers. With six members of the team group out of the picture (the names remain protected by professional secrecy and tactical mystery), thousands of “presidents” find themselves with a formation that is a minefield.
Should you field Berardi or Laurienté? What if they were the “patient zero”? Panic from political vote or, worse, from the cursed “SV” it is taking away the sum from those who have staked their credits on the black-green jewels. Without certainties, fantasy football turns into a Russian roulette where the only certain thing is that, in case of absence, the blame will be placed on bad luck, on the protocols and, inevitably, on that strange cough that appeared just before Turin.
The club’s official press release
«Sassuolo Calcio announces that, following some tests carried out in the last few days, one case of diagnosed whooping cough was found and 5 cases with compatible symptoms within the team group. The subjects showing symptoms are currently isolated and have been under constant monitoring for 3 days by the club’s medical staff who are applying all the necessary procedures.
