Applications to participate in dinners and group trips with strangers, common interests such as sports to speed up live meetings. Those looking for love online now want deep connections. Look each other in the eyes, and not through a screen
Conversations that don’t take off, get lost behind banalities or turn to sex too soon. Flames of interest that suddenly go out, becoming unanswered messages or meetings that were only promised, postponed, never happened. And then that boundless catalog of desperately winking faces, which seem like a buggy copy of a Netflix of love: you search too hard, but you never choose, convinced that the best profile will be later. It is “swipe fatigue”, the stress triggered by the compulsive use of dating apps, which end up amplifying what they should erase: the trap of virtuality, insistently looking at a screen rather than at the eyes of another.
For this reason, many users, especially the younger ones, have started to turn elsewhere, where love at first sight returns to being what it should be: not the final goal, but a happy coincidence born out of context. An unexpected gift from fate.
The best example is Strava, an application now used by almost 200 million people in 185 countries and valued at around $2 billion. It is used to record your physical activity: running, walking on roads and paths, cycling. The results are shared publicly and other users can leave an appreciation, a comment, a message of encouragement. As the New York Times wrote last November, it is “a platform that lets the truth be told.” Without filters or fake embellishments.
It’s a way to appreciate the discipline of others, the perseverance of getting up early every morning to tackle ten kilometers or prepare for a marathon, despite the rain or the scorching heat. To admire disheveled but happy selfies, without artificial poses.
This is how the desire to delve deeper and meet is born: not in front of the usual glass, but side by side on the asphalt or in nature. And movement, as we know, stimulates endorphins, the hormones of pleasure: it transforms into a surrogate for sex, perhaps into its appetizer. Because sweat melts ice, it drowns any inhibitions. And they lived toned and happy.
If Strava is too demanding, you can sign up to Tablo and join the phenomenon of “social eating”. It’s the usual, superfluous English label stuck to a platform that brings forward an effectively simple idea: organizing group meals between strangers who, while they eat, get to know each other. More than Cupid, the bucatino will be a prisoner.
The events are cataloged by city, everyone can create one. In addition to the location, the maximum number of participants and how many people have already signed up are indicated. Especially in large centres, appointments are available on the same day, in order to keep the restlessness of waiting at bay and combat an attack of loneliness by taking action. Appetite comes with eating, even in love.
If a lunch or dinner is too short to cultivate an acquaintance, you can think about a trip. On WeRoad the itineraries are classified by intensity, level of adventure or nightlife; On Adventures in the World, in some cases, the maximum age of the participants is indicated, so you find yourself among peers. And between nights under the stars, or on a dance floor, reckless climbing or long moments of relaxation on the beach, we chat live, with real laughter, not entrusted to an emoji.
The sentiment is clear, the public’s desire for concreteness, even the main dating platforms have evolved and adapted. They insist on authenticity, on knowing how to position themselves as shortcuts to encourage meetings based on a commonality of interests, not just physical attraction. About the long duration of a connection, not about the fleetingness of passion.
The most promising name is Hinge, which has registered its trademark: «Designed to be deleted». Created to be erased. The basic idea is to use technology to find the best profiles, a bit like the old marriage agencies of the past did. The new mayor of New York Zohran Mamdani met his wife on this app.
In parallel, Bumble insists on high emotional involvement, promising the Holy Grail of conquests, the soul mate: “We want our users to find meaningful relationships, to experience happy and carefree moments” is the house’s motto.
Even Tinder, the reference name in the sector, has had to adapt, to offer a “more authentic, less stressful and truly worthy of your time” experience, as CEO Spencer Rascoff explained, presenting the latest updates to the service in mid-March. Among these, the possibility of being matched with people who share your musical tastes or, for those who believe it, have good astrological compatibility. Or the help of asking the artificial intelligence, which scans the smartphone roll and suggests which are the best, most expressive photos to publish. A sort of Cyrano, who doesn’t whisper romantic phrases, but advises how to appear irresistible.
It’s probably just the beginning, someone will have already invented a clandestine function to cheat on Strava by simulating athletic sprints. But then on the first date, with breathlessness already at the second corner, we end up getting nowhere.
