In the theme song of the Olympics the Vitruvian Man appears without genitals. Controversy erupts: art, identity and political correctness in the crosshairs
Dear Vitruvian Man, I am writing you this postcard because I saw that they cut off your balls and I wanted to express my solidarity.
It’s not done like that. We spent years celebrating her and her dad’s genius Leonardo da Vinciwe have elected it as a symbol of the relationship between art and science, between man and nature, we have jealously guarded it since 1490 without even displaying it too much in museums so as not to consume it, we have exploited its image by printing it on gadgets, books, t-shirts and scarves, and now what do we do? We emasculate her. That’s right. Zac, clean break, goodbye zebedei. You too are forced to become fluid, no gender, no binary, gender void, you can find the name, who is the son of a genius. In any case, we are sure that it is something that will get your balls rolling, at least for those who still have them.
Not her, unfortunately. They took it away from him. In fact, his image of free testicles appears in the official theme song of the Olympics. Furthermore, it is not even clear who is responsible: first the finger was pointed at Rai, which in fact, after having entrusted the commentary of the opening ceremony of the Olympics to Petrecca he could do anything, even turn her into a drag queen and her dad Leonardo in a black bloc. But Rai justified itself: we receive the images sight unseen from the Olympic Broadcasting Services, a direct emanation of the Olympic Committee, which is based in Madrid. They would have been the ones to emasculate her. Evidently they can’t stand the look of his testicles. They prefer their fucking figure.
The only thing we can add to console her in her moment of pain is that hers is not the only work of art to fall foul of sexually correct censorship. One after the other, to name a few, the Baby Jesus of Raffaello Sanziothe statues of Canovathe Olympia of Manetthe Crucifix of Rubens and even a Paleolithic statuette from 30,000 years ago. So what could she expect with those Zebedees in the wind? Furthermore: don’t you know that we are in the era of the asterisk and the schwa? Don’t you know that men and women no longer exist? Peas and chips? Blue bows and pink bows? Not even his dad’s genius Leonardo he had managed to invent the rainbow bow. The woke geniuses, however, do. They got there. Now do you want to upset their beliefs by demonstrating the indisputable existence of the pea?
I know that in his time you had the right attributes. But not anymore. I don’t know if from the cases where it is kept, dear Vitruvian Man, you have followed what has happened in recent times. I don’t know if his dad Leonardo updated it. But we banned one after another Homer, Aeschylus, Sophocles, Dante, Shakespeare, Melville, Conrad, Mark Twainwe censored the fairy tales of Little Red Riding Hood (sexist) and Snow White (racist, replaced by Snow Mulatta), we enrolled Merlin the Wizard in the LGBTQ+ community and boycotted Legos as they are homophobic. Can we be surprised if they now censor her lower parts? Resign yourself: you were born to represent humanity, and in fact you represent it perfectly. Have we or have we not become a humanity without balls?
