According to a recent survey, for half of Italians having sex with artificial intelligence is not a form of infidelity, but 82% would not accept it in their couple.
Is having sex with an AI cheating? The answer, which emerged from the first major Italian survey on the topic, is a masterpiece of opportunism and moralism. For themselves, noa bit like masturbation. If, however, it is your partner who interacts with the chatbot, for 82% it is a case of betrayal.
The study was commissioned by Xlovecam, an adult entertainment platform, to the French research institute Discurv, on a representative sample of a thousand Italian adults (April 2026). The data says that the phenomenon is no longer marginal. 54% of Italians have already asked an AI for intimate or sentimental advice, and 15% do so regularly. Almost four out of ten Italians have already had, or say they want to have, some form of romantic or sexual interaction with a chatbot or avatar.
In detail: 12% have had an intimate conversation, 6% an explicitly sexual interaction, 19% have not yet done so but would like to try. Only 26% (but they are not few), he explicitly says he is comfortable with the idea of having an AI as an emotional partner, but the fact that almost one Italian in five is already experimenting something in this direction is worth more than a thousand projections.
The international context confirms that this is not an Italian eccentricity. According to the annual report Singles in America conducted by Match in association with the Kinsey Institute on over 5,000 single American adults, 16% have had romantic interactions with an AI . The share rises to 33% among Gen Z and 23% among Millennials. The use of AI in dating has grown by 333% in just one year. It’s not a niche trend: it’s an ongoing transformation.
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The ways in which people use these tools is more varied, and often more banal, than the collective imagination suggests. We’re not just talking about simulated romantic relationships with chatbots designed to act as virtual boyfriends, like Replika or Character.AI. We are talking about something more widespread and nuanced: asking ChatGPT how to react to a message from an ex, processing a sentimental disappointment with an artificial intelligence, exploring fantasies in text form before (or instead) sharing them with a partner.
The boundary between “instrument” and “relationship” is porous, and is becoming thinner. A study published in Computers in Human Behavior Reportswhich analyzed Replika users through in-depth interviews, showed that the perceived connection with the chatbot can be emotionally significant even when the user knows perfectly well that they are talking to a software. A working paper from Harvard Business School documented how certain product changes, in this specific case Replika’s decision to limit erotic conversations, have produced significant psychological effects in the most involved users.
Crisis, pain, something very similar to mourning. The fact that the other party in the relationship is an algorithm didn’t make the discomfort any less real. All this, of course, opens up uncomfortable questions.
Sign of the times or symptom of a problem?
The risk of a moralistic reading is high, and it is worth avoiding it. People have always sought forms of substitute intimacy, from erotic literature to pornography, from erotic telephones to virtual encounters. The fact that you can now have an emotionally engaging conversation with a 24-hour, non-judgmental, infinitely patient digital entity is a technological novelty, not necessarily a sign of civil decay.
However, we must deal with this trend. In the same Discurv survey, the 33% of Italians believe it is possible to develop an emotional attachment towards artificial intelligence. Among these, 8% are fully convinced and 24% consider it probable. The people who use these tools are often the same ones who express this concern. It is not a contradiction: it is the awareness of moving on still unstable ground.
The problem is not AI itself. It is that the demand for intimacy, for listening, for emotional understanding that these tools satisfy (or pretend to satisfy) is real, and is often unsatisfied in human relationships. A chatbot does not betray, it does not get distracted, it is never tired. Compared to some weddings, it is already an improvement. Cynical? Maybe yes, but not at all surreal.
The critical point is another: technology risks being both the cause and the apparent solution to the same problem. If emotional relationships are impoverished, in part because the threshold of tolerance for human complexity is lowered thanks to the ease of digital interactions, then chatbots do not cure anything. They make it more convenient to avoid working on them. Instead, it is now clear, it needs to be done and with a certain urgency.
